I Was Just Comforting Her

by Gretchen Phillips

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about

Back in the the "naughties", I decided to spend as much money and time as necessary to make the album I wanted. Thor Harris introduced me to Rob Halverson and we made this record together. I can honestly say that I enjoyed every moment of it. I got to have my drum hero, (you may know her from The Butchies, Team Dresch, Amy Ray, Vitapup), Melissa York, come down and stay with me and help compose this baby. We really had a blast. Amazing local Austin musicians lent their talents. This is what making music is all about for me.

This is my best work yet. An epic saga. A thick slab of thoughts and
feelings. A concept album. A journey. It's obviously full of individual songs, but it's meant to be heard as a whole for the sweeping scope of it. Why make an album like this in the era of download singles? Because I'm an inveterate music collector and there are some great concept albums, like Bobby Conn's "The Golden Age" and Spirit's "Twelve Dreams of Doctor Sardonicus", that I return to pleasurably over and over again. I love a bold statement, so I made one.

From my take on the uselessness of a binary that splits us as Republicans and Democrats, to the mystical, spiritual voyage of orgasms, I've got something to say. And I set those thoughts to music. Give it a listen.

credits

released February 4, 2009

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about

The Gretchen Phillips Xperience Austin, Texas

I got your lezzie rock right here! Since 1984, keeping it real in Austin, TX. What do I mean by "real"? Transgressive, literate, unapologetic, and unafraid. Plus fun. Don't forget fun. Even when it's sad, let's look for the fun.

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Track Name: Red State/Blue State
I see my path so clear
I want to live in love not fear
A million thoughts can bring me down
But if I stay in that place I'm gonna drown
Who do I know? Who do I know?
Where do I go? Where do I go?
I gotta get out of this trendy neighborhood
I gotta believe that people are good

I can't blow off my family
Even though we disagree
A leaf is twirling in the sun
It just might be that we're all one
I'm not gonna change, not gonna change
Get all angry, act all estranged
Loving is hard, but what else can I do?
Hate will really take it out of you

I see my path so clear
I want to live in hope not fear
The day I go and get a gun
Is the day the terrorists have won
Stuff's been shitty for folks, it's true
But maybe tomorrow will bring something new
I could believe that this world is going straight to hell
But I'd rather believe that kindness will prevail
Track Name: Burning Inside
A college dorm room
Ten feet square
What can I say for my twenties?
I had some high hopes
They started there
There's nothing much
To show for my twenties

But it's hot and I'm
Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside

A tiny sublet
Full of her stuff
No room to think
Can't crack a window
They're painted shut
This place stinks

And it's hot and I'm
Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside

I don't feel pretty
I don't feel okay
But I can't even get it up to cry
If I should start spewing
You'd best look away
I'd hate to put out your eye

And it's hot and I'm
Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside

I got on the bus
I took off my shirt
Some dude asked me my name
Then things got dramatic
Some dude got hurt
Oh motherfucker won't you
Tell me tell me tell me who's to blame?
When it's hot and I'm

Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside
It's hot and I'm
Burning inside
Track Name: Honey, I Feel So Good
Isn’t it nice after a long time apart to come together?
It’s good to see you again
You had something to say, what was your suggestion?
Oh, some love to reconnect old friends
That’s a good idea, I think it will help
You’re wearing your love-making smile and not much else
I’m smiling, too, I love being with you
And losing the day just cause we’re in the mood
And honey, I feel so good

Did you want to get started?
Yes I thought you did
With your self-assured ways
Your hand just slid round my back and lifted me
Now I’m floating in space
I’m one of the millions of stars
Pulsing with light
Receiving the message that everything’s right
In this moment we’re fine
And noble and good
And perfect and priceless
We do as we should
You be fire and I’ll be wood
And honey I feel so good

Don’t ever stop loving me so
Just this way, I love what you know
I relinquish control, it just gets in my way
My legs are tingling I’m exploding thru space
And you’ve got that sweet lovemaking look on your face
My pleasure is yours
Honey I feel so good
Honey I feel so good
Track Name: Peola
I realize you're tiny and you're probably scared of me
But kitten, you have nothing to fear
All I want is for you to be ever near

That's not entirely true
I also want to hold you
But you won't, you won't let me
Oh Peola, you're hurting my feelings
Peola

I realize you're moody and you just don't give a damn
About me, your master and your friend
Yet all I ever want is to serve you till the end

That's not entirely true
I also want to sleep with you
But you never come to bed
You always sleep on the couch instead
Peola

You talk and talk and yet you won't let me touch
You've gotta keep yourself clean
Methinks the lady doth protest too much
I wanna kiss you
I wanna kiss you
I wanna squish you
I wanna squish you

I realize we're different and we'll never be the same
I'm responsible and you are crazy wild
You'd bite the hand that feeds you when you get riled
Peola
Track Name: Your Drinking
I give you a call, you never answer at all
Flunking out of school again
You say “Can I borrow some money?
I’ll pay you back when my check comes in
When my daddy’s check comes in again”

Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart

You hate yourself for lying
But now that seems to be all you know how to do
Can’t look me in the eye without defiance
Or you would crumble and cry
The shame makes you want to die

Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart

All I’ve ever felt is love for you
And that will be true from the cradle to the grave
But can you love yourself?
I don’t know what else is going to save you
And I want my baby brother back

Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart
Your drinking is breaking my heart
Track Name: LYLAS
Party scene, red and green
Perfect present from you
Thoughtfulness, a friendly kiss
Always count on you
Then I'm gone, gone too long
Can't get thru, tho I try
A stony face, forbidden place
You wanna say "goodbye"

What am I gonna do?
I can't hold on to you

Spanish moss hangs like ghosts
As we bike thru the park
I see so clear a love so dear
My nails dig in the bark
What of the past? Not much I guess
It died with a cough
A stony face, forbidden place
You can really turn it off

What am I gonna do?
I can't hold on to you

Party scene, red and green
Remember when we were friends?
Oh, don't you miss me?
I can't believe that this is how the story ends
Oh don't you miss me?
I can't believe that this is how the story ends
Track Name: Swimming
I saw you first at the gym
You were just learning how to swim
I'm a certified lifeguard
I could teach you a thing or two

I think you have pretty eyes
I see you have shapely thighs
My wet dreams materialize
When you rise up out of that pool

Can I ask you a question, please?
Are you comfortable on your knees?
Could you handle a pair of these
If I offered them up to you?

Please, please let me taste you
Lick the water off of your skin
It seems such a waste to get this close
And not come in

Did you see that dude freak and stare
Enthralled by your pubic hair?
Well, it's a wondrous amount to behold
You must feel very proud

I guess I'll just cut to the chase
You have such a lovely face
Would you care to come back to my place
And....uh.......?

Please, please let me taste you
Lick the water off of your skin
It seems such a waste to get this close
And not come in
I tried and I tried to get you by the side of the pool
So I could stick my fingers in you
I tried and I tried to get you by the side of the pool
So I could stick my fingers in you
Track Name: YOY?
Watching her as she goes
With the rest of her clothes
It’s a terrible thing to lose
She must choose which one

And I wasn’t picked
I feel stupid and kicked
Like she kicked me right in the chest
I tried my best to win her

I want to summon my pride
And look her straight in the eye
Say, “there’s something strong down inside:
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing wrong, wrong with me”

Watching her over time
Assessing every line
Telling myself it wouldn’t have worked out
I’m better of without her

She’s all balled up with despair
But she has such beautiful hair
She likes to drink, she likes to go away
It hurts too much to stay

She didn’t last too long
So much unsaid, and now she’s gone
But down inside there’s something strong
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing
There is nothing wrong wrong with her
Track Name: In Case of Rapture
I had the pleasure of being stuck in traffic again
Behind a car whose bumpersticker read,
“Blessed is the country whose God is the Lord”
I guess that means the US
And I guess that means your heathen country will have to be destroyed


I had the pleasure of being stuck in traffic again
Behind a car whose bumpersticker read,
“In case of Rapture, this car will be abandoned”
So if you’re stuck behind me, you better pray to your god that
you don’t ram into me
I’m headed to a country club in the sky
The Rapture guarantees my permanent address up on high


Well, I don’t believe in the Rapture
Don’t wanna go flying thru the air
Leaving my friends all here behind
Turning my back on humankind
Why don’t we stay here and try to make things work?

Why don’t we stay here and try to make things work?
Track Name: To The Lady C
I'm so happy in love
And I think it's good for me
As a child I dreamed of
This charmed life that I now lead

I love your skin, I love your skull
I love your heart, I love your soul
I love your arms, I love your words
More than anything

But sometimes I get scared
That tragedy will befall us
Oh, can we be allowed such happiness?
Do we get to have it all?

You change me
You change me
I love to see your face
I love to see your face
I love to see your face smile at me


Please be careful with yourself
I want to see you every day
Like when you walk across the street
I think it's wise to look both ways

Thirteen years isn't much
You know I want three hundred more
To lie in bed and be your girl
I adore you

But sometimes I get scared
That my career's gonna stall
Because I like to lay around in bed
But maybe I can have it all?

You change me
You change me
I love to see your face
I love to see your face
I love to see your face smile at me